A New One To Me

[gac]

Happy birthday.

[Jimd]

Shatterproof my @$$!

Clearly they didn't do any real tests on that Lexan.

You betcha! I'm always wary of anything that has the suffix "proof"; 'cause it hardly ever is!

Shatterproof, waterproof, weatherproof, bulletproof, 100 proof.... :D

[Jimd]

We had this dude that lived in the Mental Health Unit (MHU), used to make little figurines out of a mixture of feces and peanut butter (the peanut butter gave it some workable consistency, he claimed). I called the creations "Dung Dollies". He'd yank his hair out and affix it to the dung dollies to make them more realistic. His name was Mr. Brown (ironic, ain't it?).

He'd play with the little fellas until he tired of them. And then...well, he'd munch 'em. Yep, he'd eat his own ****! 'Course, that's not the first time I'd seen a dude eating his own ****, it's far from unheard of in the prison system.

Mr. Brown also would use his fecal mixture to mold himself a wig in the shape of a pompador like Elvis used to wear. In fact, if one was to walk by his cell and see him silhouetted against the back window, one might swear he was the spittin' image of Elvis. I called his wig made of feces his "Dung Do".

Yessiree, Dung Dollies 'n Dung Dos!
It's gotta be true, 'cause who the **** could make something like this up, lol!

[Blueboost]

I can't "leave it at work" with a desk job. how you can shake days like those off and carry on with a non chelant attitude is astounding.

[Jimd]

I can't "leave it at work" with a desk job. how you can shake days like those off and carry on with a non chelant attitude is astounding.

My friend, believe me when I say this: some things, such as the story I related here, are merely entertaining.

Other stories, not so much. Like the time I watched my friend being carried off the cell block on a gurney and his teeth were knocked out and he suffered stab wounds to his head, neck, and shoulders. There was blood coming from his ears, nose, mouth, and head.

A few times, I nearly did not make it off the cell block where I was working.

Or the time I had my wrist broken. Or the muders I witnessed.

Believe me, there have been many, many, many days that I've not been able to "leave it at work". People who say that they can do that are full of the brown stuff, or else brain dead. If you are human, things like this will affect you.

The job often stays with you 24/7.

[tonydahose]

Jim you can put me down for one of your books. one thing i regret is not keeping a journal of some of the funny/crazy/sometimes sick crap i have seen. i always love when we are sitting around the kitchen table or out front shooting the sh$t and listening to the old timers tell stories. it stinks about the workmens comp, that is one thing we usually dont have a problem with. keep your chin up and the eyes in the back of your head wide open.