Family friendly jokes
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Manixguy@1994
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Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
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Doc Dan
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Re: Family friendly jokes
I want to know who Pete is and why we do things for his sake?!
Why are people still seeing Great Caesar's Ghost?
I see his work everywhere, but who is Art Deco?
Why are people still seeing Great Caesar's Ghost?
I see his work everywhere, but who is Art Deco?
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Doc Dan
- Member
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- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
A woman was golfing and hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods for her ball and found a magic frog caught in a trap.
The frog said, "If you release me, I'll grant you three wishes."
She let the frog go and the frog said I forgot to tell you that whatever you wish for your husband will get 10 times more.
She said, "That's okay. I want to be the most beautiful woman in the world."
The frog said "You do realize that that will make him 10 times better looking and he'll be the handsomest man in the world and all the women will want him."
She replied, "I know, but he'll only have eyes for me because I will be the most beautiful woman in the world."
Suddenly "poof", and she was the most beautiful woman in the world.
Then she said, "For my second wish, I want to be the richest woman in the world."
The frog said, "You realize that that means that your husband will be 10 times richer and he will be the richest man in the world."
She said "That's OK because what is mine is his and what is his is mine."
"Poof" and suddenly she was the richest woman in the world.
The frog then said, "Now what do you want for your third and final wish?"
The woman said, "I want to have a mild heart attack."
The frog said, "If you release me, I'll grant you three wishes."
She let the frog go and the frog said I forgot to tell you that whatever you wish for your husband will get 10 times more.
She said, "That's okay. I want to be the most beautiful woman in the world."
The frog said "You do realize that that will make him 10 times better looking and he'll be the handsomest man in the world and all the women will want him."
She replied, "I know, but he'll only have eyes for me because I will be the most beautiful woman in the world."
Suddenly "poof", and she was the most beautiful woman in the world.
Then she said, "For my second wish, I want to be the richest woman in the world."
The frog said, "You realize that that means that your husband will be 10 times richer and he will be the richest man in the world."
She said "That's OK because what is mine is his and what is his is mine."
"Poof" and suddenly she was the richest woman in the world.
The frog then said, "Now what do you want for your third and final wish?"
The woman said, "I want to have a mild heart attack."
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Why did Santa go into the hospital?
► Show Spoiler
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
What do you call a snowman with a sixpack?
► Show Spoiler
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Yuk! Holy Hannibal Lecter, Batman!
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Naperville
- Member
- Posts: 6155
- Joined: Sun Feb 04, 2018 1:58 am
- Location: Illinois, USA
Re: Family friendly jokes
I Support: VFW; USO; Navy SEAL Foundation, SEAL Jason Redman; America’s Warrior Partnership; Second Amendment Foundation(SAF); Gun Owners of America(GOA); Firearms Policy Coalition(FPC); Knife Rights; The Dog Aging Institute; Longevity Biotech Fellowship;
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Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
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Re: Family friendly jokes
I have
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Doc Dan
- Member
- Posts: 16323
- Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:25 am
- Location: In a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
Re: Family friendly jokes
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)
NRA Life Member
Spydernation 0050
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
-
Manixguy@1994
- Member
- Posts: 17820
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2016 12:12 pm
- Location: Central Illinois
- Contact:
Re: Family friendly jokes
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau