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Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 6:32 pm
by SpyderNut
No, I don't think you are out of line for feeling a little violated, Knutty. What she did was disrespectful. If she had been curious about what you were doing and wanted to talk with you about your project (i.e. basically being a snoop :rolleyes: ), you would have had the option to share your project with her--or not. The fact that she walked onto your property to inspect things for herself--without your knowledge or consent, was in poor taste on her part.

When possible, I do my best to put myself in others' shoes. In other words, I won't spy on my neighbors because I wouldn't want them spying on me. Unfortunately, a lot of folks don't seem to understand this concept today. In the end, sometimes you just have to help "educate" some of these folks. ;)

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 6:49 pm
by chuckd
That would have driven me (k)nuts!

My parents did a big overhaul of their house a few years ago, and because they were going to be gone a lot of the time the construction was being done, my dad installed a camera on the garage so he could keep tabs on the crew (friends of ours) and also mess with them some.

Turns out, neighbors/town folk would drive up the driveway and get out and go stroll around back behind the house because they knew we were outa town.

People are very very snoopy for some reason.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 6:52 pm
by bdblue
I think a polite neighbor doesn't wander around on your property unless they have a good reason. If you don't have a fence and she walked across your grass, that is easier to excuse than if she crossed a fence to get there.

If you have neighbors doing in appropriate things then you need multiple outside cameras so you can get evidence, otherwise you are just complaining about someone.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:14 pm
by The Mastiff
The way I was brought up was to not trespass outside actual emergencies. Even extended families property lines were to be respected. Finding a neighbor in your yard is sort of strange. Do you have a neighborhood homeowners assoc? Typically the nosy/controlling types make their way onto the boards when they can and will spy on what everyone is up to.

I can't count the amount of eccentric older single women living in this town home neighborhood. Some nice, some mean as **** and bats hit crazy. In 20 years living here I've seen some weird stuff.

I try hard to keep my darker side well hidden near home but some of the people here might be a bit more polite and respectful if it was ok to scare them a bit. Not my way though. No matter how crazy they act I smile and give the greeting of the day and ask if I can carry their trash out. No, it doesn't help them but maybe it does me. :)

joe

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:16 pm
by noseoil
"Een Soviet Union, old vermin who snoop we poot in ground and cover with dirt."

I would not have been kind, I would have told her she is trespassing and the next time I will call the police. That's why we have a fence & a wall at our house. Anyone inside is fair game, but that's just me....

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:40 pm
by Knutty
AAAAH! You guys are really making me kick myself for not leaning into her. I HATE that chagrin feeling!

All I can do is hope I see her again. And maybe sit on my doorstep for a few hours a day to better my odds. :)

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:54 pm
by Pinetreebbs
It happens all the time when building house. You don't want to be the neighborhood cranky guy but you do want to set boundaries. On the bright side, you might meet a new friend. Wandering into the back yard of an occupied home yard is crossing the privacy line and just cheeky.

I always speak first asking, "Can I help you?"

The usual response, "I'm just looking."

My response, "It's our new home and I was surprised to find someone other than my contractor wandering around." What do you think of the house? Do you live close by? blah blah blah

In your case I would wait for a response to, "Can I help you?" and nicely let them know I was quite surprised to find someone wandering around my back yard when I wasn't there. Followed by, "You're not afraid of guard dogs?" :D

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:58 pm
by Pinetreebbs
Knutty wrote:AAAAH! You guys are really making me kick myself for not leaning into her. I HATE that chagrin feeling!

All I can do is hope I see her again. And maybe sit on my doorstep for a few hours a day to better my odds. :)
Killing with kindness while asking polite questions that point out your is usually the best approach. Who knows if they are a mental case or married to the local attorney from heck.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 10:33 pm
by 1623
It seems that we're becoming a society with no middle ground, no grey area, it's all or nothing. What I mean by that is, on the one hand there are people like your nosy neighbor who have the audacity to walk on to someones property and snoop around while the owner is away. Then we have folks that prefer to stand around and do nothing at all (except shoot footage with their phones) while some serious s*#t goes down. It's like common sense and respect have disappeared...we have people who can't stay out of other peoples business and people who wouldn't dream of getting involved in anything.

I was talking to my Mom the other day while I was visiting and she told me that there was a new driver delivering propane to fill the tank for their unattached garage. Driveway is sloped and it was icy, so she watched from the slider of the house to make sure the guy got down OK. When he finished, he got the bill from the truck and walked over to hang it on the door knob, which is where the regular guy leaves it. Apparently, his curiosity got the best of him and he decided to take a good long peek through the window of the door to see what he could see. She was pissed and I don't blame her.

Sometimes all I can do is shake my head and hope that I'm teaching my kids what' right and wrong, the way that my parents taught me.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:47 am
by Evil D
paladin wrote:Knutty when she said "...Looks like you're installing a pool..."

You could have given her a SmartA** answer like "No it's actually for testing ballistics for my arsenal!" * as you draw your .45 and rack the slide :eek: :rolleyes:
"That's not a pool, it's a mass grave..."

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:29 am
by chuckd
Evil D wrote:[
"That's not a pool, it's a mass grave..."
Ha! Evil, I think that may provoke her to make trouble out of fear, although it would definitely be comical.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:44 am
by demoncase
The Lord invented the solution to this situation.

It's called patience combined with daisy-chained string of M18 Claymore mines ;)

Oh, and enough earplugs for the whole family :D

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:53 am
by IG-88
Put up some signs for the future :)


Image

Image

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 10:42 am
by twinboysdad
DO NOT SECOND GUESS yourself. Your are not less of a tough guy for not going all Jack Nicholson in "As Good As It Gets" on this lady. Consider the "Art of War" response instead, now you know more about her and her behavior. Not to mention she probably is not the only one, just the only one you caught!

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2015 1:09 am
by Monocrom
No, not crazy. She was ridiculously rude. And yes, her behavior was inappropriate. I wouldn't show up at my best friend's backyard unannounced. And I've known him for nearly 25 years.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2015 5:36 am
by O,just,O
Knutty wrote:All I can do is hope I see her again.
Don't worry, you will.
One nice warm summers afternoon & there she is swimming in your pool in an itsy bitsy teeny weenie yellow polka-dot bikini.
O.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2015 6:29 am
by The Deacon
Knutty wrote:She said "I see you're having a pool put in!" and I just said "Yep."
No, it's going to be a mosh pit, you're welcome to come.
or
No, we're going to host female mud wrestling events, you're welcome to compete.

On a more serious note, add me to the list of those who'd consider it a breach of etiquette for an adult to just wander about my property. The only possible justification, assuming the rules of your HOA are similar to those of mine, would be if she was a board member or agent, and had been sent by the association to make sure the CCR's were being followed. However, if that was the case, she should have said so.

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2015 1:39 pm
by Essexman
You know where she lives, pop over, take a walk around her garden, see what she has to say?

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2015 4:58 pm
by JD Spydo
Hey KNUTTY one thing I would like to point out to you concerning having a pool in your back yard. We have some very strange laws concerning swimming pools and other recreational type stuff in your yard>> or anything that the law can construe as an "Attractive Nuisance". You better put up a tall fence and post it with "NO TRESPASSING" signs. Because here in Missouri you can be held liable in the event that anyone's young child would venture on to your property and get hurt or even worse possibly drown in the swimming pool GOD Forbid. There was a pharmacist here locally that my parents knew really well who was very well off financially and had a kid drown in his swimming pool in his back yard and it caused him so much legal trouble to where he was fighting it in court for years after that happened>> it wreaked havoc on him and his family financially for years after that.

Because here in Missouri whenever a kid is involved the jurys tend to side with the kid and the family even if they were in the wrong. So do check with an attorney in your state and get some solid advice and protect yourself>> because here where I live and in many other states swimming pools can be a serious liability problem. Maybe it's better where you live and I certainly hope it is for your sake. And if you have guests over for a pool party make very sure they are decent people and good friends who are responsible and watch their kids closely because I've truly heard many nightmare horror stories about swimming pool incidents>> every state has different liability laws and it's up to you to know them unfortunately>> and check your homeowner's insurance to make sure your covered in the event you would need additional coverage. Be very careful with that swimming pool my friend :(

Re: Sanity check on unwanted visitors

Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2015 5:02 pm
by JD Spydo
JD Spydo wrote: Sorry misprint :(