Martial Arts Experiences Discussion Thread

[James Y]

Most People are Surprised by This Truth About Psychopaths



At first glance this seems to be 100% UNRELATED to martial arts. It is not. Self-defense is NOT only about physical fighting. Avoidance of negative situations is SD. Awareness is SD, including being able to perceive people's true intentions. You may not be able to do that with 100% accuracy at first, with someone you only briefly met. But people who are acquaintances, co-workers, friends, foes, whatever, you should be able to read them at some point. I would say especially in cases of significant others / spouses.

I've mentioned in this thread that I've known at least two separate colleagues (as well as a few other people I simply met) at different times and diffetent places in my life who were psychopaths. I never had any real problems with either of the two colleagues, personally, but I instinctively knew their true natures, *and they knew that I knew.* It was unspoken between us, but it was obvious. From the first time I met them, I had an instant feeling of repulsion.

The same feeling I later had when a friend of mine had suddenly gotten married to a woman, and upon meeting her at their reception (they held their reception sometime after they were married), I felt an immediate, intense dislike for her, even though she came across as normal. It turned out my instincts about her were right, and my friend's marriage turned into a nightmare for the few years it lasted. Luckily, he divorced her and got custody of their child. His ex is no longer on this mortal coil; I'll leave it at that.

I'm not saying I'm psychic or anything. But many people ignore or suppress their natural gut instincts for fear of feeling "silly," or being unfairly judgmental. I trust my gut reactions. And if by chance someone fools me at first and my gut doesn't pick up on their true nature (yes, it's happened), it doesn't take long for me to figure them out. Don't listen to what people say; observe their actions and behaviors when they think nobody is watching them.

Many psychopaths can turn on the charm, and certain types of people find them very magnetic. Cult leaders and certain politicians are extreme examples of this. So many people are taken in by their charms, which are false fronts to fool people and gain their trust. Many people cannot imagine that someone so 'normal-looking," or 'charming' and 'charismatic' can be so evil. They fall for the act and let their guard down.

Self-defense is about a lot more than martial arts styles, striking and grappling techniques, weapons, or whatever. What good is it to be able to physically fight, but be easily (and willingly) manipulated and have your life ruined by some narcissist?

Jim

[Scandi Grind]

Well said, Jim. I think learning to read people, and actively engaging in the practice is a very valuable tool. I am distrustful by nature, so studying people has always been important to me. I try to foster the skill any way I can.

[Naperville]

Avoidance. I try to limit all interractions with people. People do not care about other people, even within a family.

Nothing works. No respect. This has been going on for many decades. This is not new.

[Naperville]

Chris Chappell from the YouTube channel "China Uncensored" just won a medal for Chinese Martial Arts!

The following link may work to see the video but you cannot post:
https://www.patreon.com/posts/i-just-wo ... dium=email

[James Y]

Well said, Jim. I think learning to read people, and actively engaging in the practice is a very valuable tool. I am distrustful by nature, so studying people has always been important to me. I try to foster the skill any way I can.

Yes, it is definitely a skill. I remember as far back as a toddler, quietly sitting or lying down and observing adults having conversations and watching their reactions. I notice people's body language and micro-expressions; and at the risk of sounding "woo-woo" (and not caring), the "vibe" that someone gives off. It's not magic; it's simply using one's own basic awareness, and seeing people as they truly are, to the best of one's ability.

Sometimes I wonder if being naturally introverted has something to do with it. I'm not a shy person, and I can talk to almost anyone if I need to. But in general, I don't open up to just anyone. I've noticed that a lot of outgoing, social butterfly types oftentimes haven't picked up on subtle things about other people that I have.

Jim

[James Y]

Avoidance. I try to limit all interractions with people. People do not care about other people, even within a family.

Nothing works. No respect. This has been going on for many decades. This is not new.

If I want to, I can go for long periods without speaking a word at all, except to exchange pleasantries, such as while shopping, or responding to a polite stranger. Some people go crazy if they cannot talk for only a few hours. Many people need the constant stimulation of talking to other people.

I do have friends with whom I sometimes have long conversations with. But that's because we share a lot in common, and actually have something of relevance to talk about. And we don't have such long conversations very often.

Jim

[Naperville]

Avoidance. I try to limit all interractions with people. People do not care about other people, even within a family.

Nothing works. No respect. This has been going on for many decades. This is not new.

If I want to, I can go for long periods without speaking a word at all, except to exchange pleasantries, such as while shopping, or responding to a polite stranger. Some people go crazy if they cannot talk for only a few hours. Many people need the constant stimulation of talking to other people.

I do have friends with whom I sometimes have long conversations with. But that's because we share a lot in common, and actually have something of relevance to talk about. And we don't have such long conversations very often.

Jim

Until I was married, I spent my days working or hanging out with The Guys. That happened a few times in my life. I just don't see it happening anymore. People change and friendships come and go. I've changed. This goes for past friends, girlfriends, an ex wife, etc. I've enjoyed spending time with people but we grow up and grow apart.

Looking forward to the next set of friends.

[James Y]

Avoidance. I try to limit all interractions with people. People do not care about other people, even within a family.

Nothing works. No respect. This has been going on for many decades. This is not new.

If I want to, I can go for long periods without speaking a word at all, except to exchange pleasantries, such as while shopping, or responding to a polite stranger. Some people go crazy if they cannot talk for only a few hours. Many people need the constant stimulation of talking to other people.

I do have friends with whom I sometimes have long conversations with. But that's because we share a lot in common, and actually have something of relevance to talk about. And we don't have such long conversations very often.

Jim

Until I was married, I spent my days working or hanging out with The Guys. That happened a few times in my life. I just don't see it happening anymore. People change and friendships come and go. I've changed. This goes for past friends, girlfriends, an ex wife, etc. I've enjoyed spending time with people but we grow up and grow apart.

Looking forward to the next set of friends.

Good points, Naperville.

I've made sets of friends, and after a period of time, we go our separate ways. We grow and change, and/or our circumstances change. That's nature.

There are some people who still maintain the same group of friends they've known since elementary school, but IMO, that's rare, unless maybe if they all remained in the same small town all their lives.

I don't speak with many of the martial artists I knew anymore. Probably 3 of them, at most. And I almost never speak with them anymore. And when we do speak, it's they who generally reach out to me. I've changed so much, especially within the last few years.

It's important to be non-attached, whether to friendships or other relationships. Friendships and friend groups form and dissolve when the energy that formed them and held them together has served its purpose and dissipates. It's only natural. Then you are free to move on to form new ones, while being grateful for the friendships that you had.

BTW, to anyone thinking this discussion has nothing to do with martial arts, it has a LOT to do with it. NON-ATTACHMENT also applies to martial arts, because the vast majority of martial arts people become overly-attached to following a certain dogma. "My way is the only way." This applies not only to martial arts, but to many aspects of life. Not being overly-attached to a certain way allows for adaptability, if you discover something that resonates more, or works better, for YOU.

Jim

[Scandi Grind]

Hmm, I suppose the older I get the more I realize how lucky I am with the few friendships I have. I have never known many people, and in general I can only handle so many relationships anyway, but I don't spend time with people unless I really trust them. That list is very small, so sometimes I felt a little lonely, but every friend I have made I am still in touch with. We don't have time to talk to each other all the time anymore, but they are the kind that I would trust in a life or death situation. Some people don't have anyone like that. I also have a big family that has been tried by fire on more than one occasion and proven that they will stand in harms way for each other's sake. We're extremely tight, an unusually good team, and I can attribute most of that to my amazing parents, and our faith in God.

[James Y]

Thanks for sharing that, Scandi Grind.

Jim

[James Y]

5 Self-Defense Lies You May Be Believing

Hallelujah! Someone else has finally said it (about the "just run away" myth). For years, it seemed like I was the only person online pointing this out.



Jim

[James Y]

Non-Permissive Environment Newspaper



Jim

[James Y]

Brutal Knockout in a Road Rage Fight / Caught on Camera

This was definitely somewhere in Southeast Asia. Could've been in Thailand, but not necessarily. On second thought, it could have also been somewhere in China.



Jim

[Naperville]

Want to own Bruce Lee’s iconic ‘Enter the Dragon’ weapon? Here’s what it’ll cost you

IN THE NEWS
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AUCTION SITE
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[James Y]

Tatsuya Naka, Kata Applications



Jim

[James Y]

What Most People Miss About Knife Work



Jim

[Naperville]

What Most People Miss About Knife Work



Jim

He's 100% right. Go in a sceptic and remain a sceptic. Pay attention, watch a lot of street fights, watch a lot of tape, and try to learn how the body moves.

I respect those who have instructed me, not because they taught me 100 things to do in a jam, but that they showed me 5 things or less to do and I try to remember those things. It's kind of crazy to spend a year or more to learn 5 things but I am telling you, that is what you better stick to. Don't try to become John Wick, that is a movie and it is not real.

Most martial arts, grappling, boxing and combatives are B.S. plain and simple. As he said, did you train against dozens of people of all different abilities, sizes and musculature? Did you train against a 1 inch fixed blade and a 10 inch fixed blade? Did you repeat the training enough to recall it when you need it? Did you over train in something that will get you killed on the street?

[James Y]

What Most People Miss About Knife Work



Jim

He's 100% right. Go in a sceptic and remain a sceptic. Pay attention, watch a lot of street fights, watch a lot of tape, and try to learn how the body moves.

I respect those who have instructed me, not because they taught me 100 things to do in a jam, but that they showed me 5 things or less to do and I try to remember those things. It's kind of crazy to spend a year or more to learn 5 things but I am telling you, that is what you better stick to. Don't try to become John Wick, that is a movie and it is not real.

Most martial arts, grappling, boxing and combatives are B.S. plain and simple. As he said, did you train against dozens of people of all different abilities, sizes and musculature? Did you train against a 1 inch fixed blade and a 10 inch fixed blade? Did you repeat the training enough to recall it when you need it? Did you over train in something that will get you killed on the street?

I agree, in terms of real-life combat / self-defense. Simple is the only way to go. It's not about secret techniques, and impressive-looking, sophisticated moves. IMO, artistry does have its place in martial arts; protecting your life is NOT that place.

My self-defense toolbox contains only a few simple, basic skills that have been pretty much the same for decades.

Now, I did train in many martial arts throughout my life. I earned black belts in two arts, and instructor level in a third. I learned the techniques and applications as they were taught. I even competed using traditional combinations effectively in actual competition.

That said, self-defense is NOT a competition. There are a few moves that I NEVER used in competition, and those are what make up my SD toolbox. They are simple, effective, and are not impressive-looking. They would NOT be thrilling to see in a movie fight scene. They just work. And they are not style-specific; they are taken from a few different styles and modified to be effective for ME. I have trained them 'til I'm sick and tired of them, then trained them some more. I've analyzed them, keeping in mind the elements of surprise, the inevitable adrenaline rush, the opponent's actions / reactions, environment, size differences, using them pre-emptively, etc.

If you have TOO MANY options, you will freeze. If your SD strategy is the same as in sport fighting, you may or may not be successful, depending on the aggressor(s), and how experienced and dirty they are in real fighting. If your strategy includes complex sequences, it's not going to work for anything, other than against a compliant person.

I appreciate the art in martial art. It develops coordination, strengthens your body, builds discipline, and makes learning fun. But I'm not invested in tradition. Respect to those who are. But for me, at this point in my life, all I care about, martial art-wise, is to be as effective as I can, for myself. I could show anyone what's in my SD toolbox in a few minutes to an hour. But nothing in it would work for someone else who hasn't put in the time, the sweat, hasn't had the same experience, and who hasn't trained them until they are second nature and confident in using them.

In sport fighting, boxing, wrestling, and Muay Thai generally rule; not because they are inherently superior arts, but because they are 100% application-based. They have relatively few techniques, but they only use what actually works in the context of their respective sports. They don't need to learn 100 counters to a step-through and freeze right hand straight punch.

The same idea must apply to SD. If I showed my SD stuff, someone who sees it would not be impressed, because it looks basic and easy. But they aren't used in sport, at least not MOST of them, and it takes considerable training and experience to make them natural actions and reactions under stress.

If someone is too invested in sport fighting, they cannot apply the type of basic SD stuff I've settled on for real, because under stress, you will either respond how you train, or you will freeze. It's NOT a matter of, "I could do it if I choose to." If you're a dedicated sport fighter, your natural response will be sport fighting (or simply brawling) in a life-or-death situation, when that might not be an effective option.

Jim

[James Y]

Don't. Underestimate. Anyone.

(My title; video below)

First off, I do not give a hoot about political parties, I do not like political pundits on any side, and this is not a political discussion; so if anybody responds to this video, please keep politics out of it. I'm posting this for educational purposes in regards to violence.

Far too many people underestimate other people based on size, appearance, gender, etc. And they OVER-estimate others based on those same factors. The big, Haystacks Calhoun-looking guy who gets KO'd in the footage certainly underestimated "pink shirt." The guy commenting on the footage is certainly guilty of underestimating others based on size, appearance, etc. It shows that the commenter knows absolutely nothing about real violence. I've witnessed in person enough "non-sporting" incidents where the person or persons who were "supposed to win" went down hard and didn't get up. Underestimating the potential danger that someone could pose in a violent situation based on their looks can be potentially lethal.



Jim

[Doc Dan]

If I were younger and had it to do all over again, I would study Judo, especially martial judo. It is extremely effective against even larger aggressors. I wrestled in high school and a lot of what we did was Judo, though we couldn't throw someone unless we were kneeling. I have witnessed Judo in action and let me tell you, it is devastating.