Family friendly jokes

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Doc Dan
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1961

Post by Doc Dan »

Cars nowadays have too many gadgets, like movie screens. I tried to reverse the other day and it played a video of a man getting run over by a car.
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1962

Post by Manixguy@1994 »

:winking-tongue Image You beat me to it!
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1963

Post by Doc Dan »

Manixguy@1994 wrote: ↑
Sat Aug 23, 2025 4:43 am
 :winking-tongue Image You beat me to it!
Great minds think alike. Or, maybe warped minds think alike! :grin-smiling-eyes
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1964

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1965

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1966

Post by Doc Dan »

Last night I walked past a restaurant with a sign that said:
“Order anything you want, and if we don’t have it, we’ll give you £500.”

So I went inside and ordered giraffe ears on toast with a side of baboon tails.

A little while later, the waiter came back with £500 in cash and said:
“It’s your lucky day… we’re out of bread.”
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1967

Post by Doc Dan »

95% of all EV's are still on the road.
► Show Spoiler
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1968

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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The Meat man
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1969

Post by The Meat man »

Doc Dan wrote: ↑
Fri Aug 22, 2025 10:21 pm
 Cars nowadays have too many gadgets, like movie screens. I tried to reverse the other day and it played a video of a man getting run over by a car.
That's awful! Haha! :rofl
- Connor

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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1970

Post by Manixguy@1994 »

Image
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1971

Post by Doc Dan »

Me: This shoe is too tight.

Salesperson: Try it with the tongue out.

Me: It'th thtill thoo thight.
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1972

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1973

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Doc Dan
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1974

Post by Doc Dan »

Image
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1975

Post by Manixguy@1994 »

Image
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
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James Y
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1976

Post by James Y »

A police officer came to my house and asked where I was between 5 and 6. He seemed irritated when I answered: "Kindergarten."

Jim
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1977

Post by Doc Dan »

How long does a person have to be dead before it's considered archaeology instead of grave robbing? Asking for a friend.
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Doc Dan
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1978

Post by Doc Dan »

I didn't make it to the gym today. That's five years in a row.
I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessing on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest and Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! (John Adams regarding the White House)

Follow the Christ, the King,
Live pure, speak true, right wrong, follow the King--
Else, wherefore born?" (Tennyson)


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Manixguy@1994
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1979

Post by Manixguy@1994 »

Image
MNOSD 0002 / Do more than is required of you . Patton
Nothing makes earth so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau
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Ow!Icutmyself!
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Re: Family friendly jokes

#1980

Post by Ow!Icutmyself! »

SkullBouncer wrote: ↑
Tue May 05, 2020 8:36 am
 The longest palindrome of which I am aware:

A Man A Plan A Canal Panama


;) :D
Satorarepotenetoperarotas
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