Brilliant!z4vdBt wrote: ↑Wed May 13, 2020 9:19 pmWhile riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head. Dazed and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new convertible pulled up with a very beautiful woman who asked - Are you okay?
As I looked up, I noticed she was wearing a low-cut blouse with a cleavage to die for.
I'm okay I think.
Get in and I'll take you home, so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head.
That's nice of you, but I don't think my wife will like me doing that.
Oh come now, I'm a nurse. I need to see if you have any more scrapes and then treat them properly.
I'm sure my wife won't like this.
We arrived at her place which was just few miles away and, after a couple of cold beers and the bandaging, I thanked her and said - I feel a lot better, but I know my wife is going to be really upset so I'd better go now.
Don't be silly. Stay for a while. She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?
My guess is that she's still in the ditch.
Hahaha! funny!z4vdBt wrote: ↑Thu Jun 04, 2020 10:19 pmA gorilla dies of old age at a zoo right before the zoo opens. It is the only gorilla at the zoo since they are not very profitable. However, the gorilla is their most popular attraction by far, and they cannot afford to go a day without it. So the zoo owner asks one of his workers to wear a gorilla suit they have in storage for an extra $100 a day if he will go in the gorilla cage and pretend to be the gorilla until the zoo can afford a new one.
Quickly, the new gorilla becomes the most popular craze at the zoo. People from all over are coming to see the Human-like gorilla. About a month in, the craze has started to wear off. So,to get peoples attention back, he decides to climb over his enclosure and hang from the net ceiling above the lions den next to him. A large crowd of people gather watching the spectacle in awe and terror.
Suddenly the man loses his grip and falls to the floor of the lions den. The man starts screaming help, help. The lion pounces him from behind and whispers in his ear - Shut up right now or you're going to get us both fired.
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