Sad bullying news

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c.joe
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Sad bullying news

#1

Post by c.joe »

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101008/ap_ ... g_one_town

It was heartbreaking to read this article. Especially this section:
Meredith Rezak, 16, shot herself in the head three weeks after the death of Mohat, a good friend of hers. Her cell phone, found next to her body, contained a photograph of Mohat with the caption "R.I.P. Eric a.k.a. Twiggy."

Rezak was bright, outgoing and a well-liked player on the volleyball team. Shortly before her suicide, she had joined the school's Gay-Straight Alliance and told friends and family she thought she might be gay.

Juratovac says Rezak endured her own share of bullying — "name-calling, just stupid trivial stuff" — but nobody ever knew it was getting to her.

"Meredith ended up coming out that she was a lesbian," he says. "I think much of that sparked a lot of the bullying from a lot of the other girls in school, 'cause she didn't fit in."

Her best friend, Kevin Simon, doesn't believe that bullying played a role in Rezak's death. She had serious issues at home that were unrelated to school, he says.

After Mohat's death, people saw Rezak crying at school, and friends heard her talk of suicide herself.

A year after Rezak's death, the older of her two brothers, 22-year-old Justin, also shot and killed himself. His death certificate mentioned "chronic depressive reaction."

This March, her only other sibling, Matthew, died of a drug overdose at age 21.

Their mother, Nancy Merritt, lives in Colorado now. She doesn't think Meredith was bullied to death but doesn't really know what happened. On the phone, her voice drifts off, sounding disconnected, confused.

"So all three of mine are gone," she says. "I have to keep breathing."
I'm speechless. I can't believe those parents can endure a life like that.
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On Edge
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#2

Post by On Edge »

I'm with you man. Cannot imagine. Don't know if I'm that strong.

Praying for that lady.
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ChrisR
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#3

Post by ChrisR »

Very sad indeed ... bullying is too often ignored or not taken seriously and it often scars its victims for life. But this case seems to highlight what can happen in a person/family where depression is a serious issue.
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#4

Post by vampyrewolf »

... speaking of it leaving the victims scarred...

[just deleted a 1/2 page rant/description of the experiences I had]

How did it change me? Knowing the system doesn't work, I have no respect for authority, only the individual if they have earned it. I'm not threatened or angered easily, and intimidate a lot of people either through physical presence or my methods.

It made me self sufficient and gave me the drive to make a difference myself.
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Why do people worry more if you argue with your voices than if you just talk with them? What about if you lose those arguements?
Slowly going crazy at work... they found a way to make the voices work too.
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#5

Post by HellHound »

'Treat others like you would want to be treated' If humans would follow this simple rule none of the crap would have happened.
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markg
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#6

Post by markg »

Bullies have always been a part of life, a painful part of knife. The problem we have today is the fact that the boundaries that once gave us safe haven are gone. If someone bullied you at school, you had some sanctuary from that at home. Texting, social media, et al. now enable people to stalk victims with no safe haven.

Teens as a demographic are prone to suicidal idealization, and parents and care givers need to be nosey about your child's friends and emotional well being. The teen brain has a hard time dealing with impulses and impulsive behaviors. Wait and see attitudes are not the best form parents.

If your child is the victim of a bully or harassing behavior at school. Respond aggressively. Be strong and polite, however make an appointment with the principle and make it clear, your next appointment with them will be with your lawyer. If any of the harassment is of a sexual nature, make sure you say the "sexual harassment" term a lot. Notify them you are making an appointment with the superintendent and are notifying the media. In other words, "bring the hammer." Keep in mind, do you realize how many kids are picking on other kids in a school? You gotta make noise, and know how to get attention.

A lot of these stories involve "sexting." If you are parent of a minor, the simple way to deal with this is to disable picture mail on their account. They will live. Are there other ways to send pictures? Yes, but teens have an aversion to e-mail so it does limit it. Most teens have no idea the repercussions of sending a nude photo of themselves to someone. Most teen boys see it as a "trophy" and are compelled to send it to friends to show off. The 10 guys that have it have no obligation to keep it to themselves, and in time it is sent to 5000 people. Then they are called "sluts and whores" by everyone they meet. Simple don't give them ability to do so.

By the way, I learned this all by raising 4 teenagers, 3 of which are girls. And I will say most was learned the hard way...
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#7

Post by FIMS »

I take pride in bullying those who bully others.
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Hmmm...

#8

Post by Hannibal Lecter »

My Dear Friends,

If you think your child is being bullied DO something. Stick your nose into every aspect of your child's life and find out what's going on, raise **** with whoever in authority will listen, and continue to do so until someone actually does listen.

Enduring bullying as a child and adolescent can easily turn you into a bitter, distrustful, chronically angry person for years afterwards.

Don't ask me how I know.

--------
Hannibal
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"I have followed with enthusiasm the course of your disgrace and public shaming. My own never bothered me except for the inconvenience of being incarcerated, but you may lack perspective."
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c.joe
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#9

Post by c.joe »

Friend just shared this with me. Joel Burns tells teenagers that it'll get better once you're past the bullying stage.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ax96cghOnY4

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#10

Post by npueppke »

Just heard an interview with Joel Burns on NPR too, definitely a great message going out there.
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#11

Post by AJF »

Thanks for posting that. As a born and bred Texas boy, I can tell you that speech took some guts. Very moving, and very true. And yep, things will get better....

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#12

Post by defenestrate »

Hannibal Lecter wrote: Enduring bullying as a child and adolescent can easily turn you into a bitter, distrustful, chronically angry person for years afterwards.

Don't ask me how I know.
+1 to this sentiment. To this day I'm pretty sure my strong avdocacy for underdogs and victims of intimidation and similar are largely a direct result of my own experiences as a kid who was a little bit different and not very big (until high school when I got more into average size range). While I wouldn't wish a childhood of being bullied for anyone, I can definitely say that it has made me who I am in ways that are certainly not all bad.
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#13

Post by defenestrate »

C.joe, that is a heartbreaking story. Don't know how I would be able to cope with something like this either.. :(
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#14

Post by vampyrewolf »

defenestrate wrote:+1 to this sentiment. To this day I'm pretty sure my strong avdocacy for underdogs and victims of intimidation and similar are largely a direct result of my own experiences as a kid who was a little bit different and not very big (until high school when I got more into average size range). While I wouldn't wish a childhood of being bullied for anyone, I can definitely say that it has made me who I am in ways that are certainly not all bad.
It doesn't take size to be intimidating, though it helps. I fought back from grade 6 onwards, and spent a good deal of grade 7 and 8 making yet another visit to the office after tracking down and singling out the folks who teamed up on me 5+ at a time. Sad to say, I took pleasure in convincing them to leave me alone. The school had a problem with me, but not the rest of my classmates who made me what I am.
Get to high school and I only had to make examples of a couple of people. At 6'0 and 185 it didn't take much convincing.

Personally, I don't know if I'd be where I am today if it wasn't for those kids beating on me. While the bitter distrusting existence doesn't allow much in the way of friendship, it also removes a VAST amount of what I now consider flaws and weaknesses. Left me very independent, and somewhat cold hearted. I had to fight to get where I am, and came out stronger for it.
Coffee before Conciousness
Why do people worry more if you argue with your voices than if you just talk with them? What about if you lose those arguements?
Slowly going crazy at work... they found a way to make the voices work too.
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#15

Post by Pinetreebbs »

Myth about high school:

"These are the best years of your life."
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#16

Post by npueppke »

Pinetreebbs wrote:Myth about high school:

"These are the best years of your life."
+100. Only thing about high school is that it's better than middle school.
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#17

Post by FIMS »

Highschool was the worst five years of my life. Hands down.
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#18

Post by Sweetness34 »

I'm heavily involved in the drama department at my high school and this year we were asked to put on a play for5th-8th graders about bullying and this play has truly opened my eyes to how much bullying actually goes on inside schools, and I wish that more schools were doing this exact play so that these kids could see the effects of bullying before they get to high school. Here is a link if you are interested: http://www.indeonline.com/schools/x1722 ... e-on-stage
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#19

Post by Mr. Shawn »

c.joe wrote:Friend just shared this with me. Joel Burns tells teenagers that it'll get better once you're past the bullying stage.
c.joe, thank you for posting this video. The "it gets better" message is the cornerstone of a project started by Dan Savage and Terry Miller less than one month ago: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IcVyvg2Qlo
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#20

Post by Chucula »

Suicide, bullying, death penalty, drug overdose, destruction, etc are not problems. They are the last of a sequence of events set in motion by some problem, usually years in the past and related to bad attitude and lack of wisdom.

I feel sorry for the people who are hurt by the mistakes of others. Try to be a sink for evil rather than a source or a bridge. I see a lot of bridges of evil: people who are nice to others as long as others are nice to them. Try to be kind to people regardless of how they act towards you, absorb any bad emotions that are sent your way. And get a gun (or knife ;) ) for the people who really are evil, because you have a right to live as much as anyone else.
Hate never yet dispelled hate.
Only love dispels hate.
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Also, FWIW, I think the years until college were the best of my life. I am in grad school now and it is ok, but by now I worry about providing for myself. As a kid, I never worried about anything except how long it would be until recess or dinner.
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