Luck of the Irish

[defenestrate]

For those of us who ARE Irish, we know that the "Luck of the Irish" does NOT necessarily mean good luck, and can in fact be far from it. However, my luck appears to finally be changing. Let me give a rundown of the past month:

1. The mother of my children turns into a tweaker (freebasing crystal meth/"Ice"). Stops saying she loves me. Spends days at a time at the dopeman's house.
2. On mother's day, I buy her a phone and go to visit (we have not been able to live together for financial reasons and it was rough sometimes) and spend the day as a family. She spends the whole day focusing on getting high, stealing money from me, is completely unaccountable for her actions, etc. Negligent with the kids (I and her parents are watching them so it's okay). At the end of the night, she tells me she wants me to die and that I will NEVER see my boys again. Kicks me out of her crackhead friend's house.
3. On the attempted way home (I am not in my right mind at this time for obvious reasons) I get in a nasty car wreck. I spend 2 days in intensive care as I try to remember what the **** happened on mother's day (I was in shock for a while and pretty shook up from the wreck and it seemed to be messing w/my memory (no concussion, fortunately). On the way home from the hospital I realize she has not only taken all the money from my wallet but my bankcard (from which she spent every cent she could), and my spare cell phone. I get home with nothing. No money, no phone, I have a new job coming up and I need to have gas and a means to communicate. No dice.
4. One of my so-called friends (once thought he was my best friend) has been stealing from my farm in the dead of night, taking whatever he wants (farm is in foreclosure and I haven't been able to stay there). He has gone back for more. Complete disregard for the possibility that someone might actually be going out there and seeing what's happening (which indeed I did). Total doublecross. Thinking of pressing charges if I can find enough proof (or at least catching him in the act next time).

Now, for the positive:
1. I have finally been able to let go of what has been a toxic relationship for some time now. No more guilt trips, no more being treated like $#!+ for no good reason.
2. I met the most incredible girl. she is geeky like me, very nicely proportioned, cute as a button, has amazing eyes, and treats me like I am the risen Jesus (no offense intended, she just treats me REALLY REALLY well). A singer and talented writer, quite possibly the funniest girl I have EVER met (we spend almost all day laughing when together), capable of taking care of me in ways my ex could only dream of, a good cook (made about the best meatloaf I have ever had last weekend), absolutely 100% positive with me, supportive and faithful/loyal to a fault (something we share), and just an all-around amazing woman. I have fallen for her harder and faster than I'd ever thought possible. The best part is that it is 100% mutual. we just can't get enough of eachother.
3. I reported the thefts to the bank, where they ended up being refunded. I resurrected my Jeep (hadn't run for 4+ years, put a new battery in and she cranked up on the FIRST try. amazing) which is so much more fun to drive than my Honda was and has been through a lot with me. I have completely cut off the ex - all future child support payments will go through the grandparents so they aren't spent on dope.
4. I got a cool new job at IBM (see my other post about this). Stoked about it. got offered a whole ton of jobs all at once. Very cool.
5. Finally moved into my own place again (had been staying with parents due to job market difficulties, etc.). No more family drama. No more insulting vitriol from the ex. Just my own quiet pleasant cozy apartment.
6. I've been getting a lot more into music lately. I know when I'm with someone who really works for me becuase my musical aptitude goes up. And how! I have been picking up more songs lately than I have in some time, and I am starting to work on some new songs. Have a couple of potential solo gigs in the works and a couple of bands I have discussed collaborating with. Have also made it out to some great shows lately and making new friends thanks to a longtime friend who knows LOTS of people and loves me to death. She introduced me to my new girl. Good stuff.

I guess that is kind of a general summary of the most fundamental things that have happened within the past month. It's been intense, but good in the end. What a rollercoaster ride getting there, though! Anyway, thanks for listening, ya'll. :D

[ChrisR]

Blimey ... glad your luck seems to have turned the corner :) But what a completely mind-blowing series of events :eek: Some days I am glad that I have a relatively boring life :D

[Dr. Snubnose]

You go guy go!!!!Doc :D :D

[defenestrate]

Thankya, Dr. Snubnose.. and ChrisR, yeah, It's been interesting, to be sure. Intense, fatiguing, maddening at times, but definitely interesting.. Things are looking up now though so I am not complaining

[Donut]

Wow, intensive care for two days?! I hope you heal up quick. I had surgery the day after mother's day and I'm still healing and the stitches are annoying.

It's good to see you're moving in the right direction. Keep your head up, I think you will be doing good very soon. :)

[ChrisR]

Things are looking up now though so I am not complaining

Sounds like you are in an ideal position to reward yourself with a shiny, new Spyderco ... it usually works for me :D

[PaloArt]

Oh man, how nice to see that your luck turned about 180 degrees
I wish you this to last looooooong and even longer time :D after that s..t you came through you deserve it

and of course as other said - buy new spyderco :p it will raise your mood to unbelievable heights. :D

take care, Pavel

[Toad310]

Hope things stay good. Everyone has trouble, but you have had a very tough string of events.

It will all work out in the end, you seem to have a person who cares for you, and that is a major thing.

Time does take care of things.

Wishing you all the best and good luck,

Toad

PS...You know, another knife Can't hurt!

[defenestrate]

Yes, I think as soon as my first paycheck comes in I will likely pick up a new knife. Re: healing up, I'm mostly healed now, aside from my neck being a little more finicky and crackly than it ever has been before, I don't think anything is visible from the wreck anymore at this point. I know a good Chiro Doc who I will probably go see as soon as my insurance gets turned up.

Thanks for the sentiments and well-wishes, all. A Class act, every one of yas.

[SkullBouncer]

Dude, GOOD On Ya for persevering! Eliminate the Negative; Accentuate the Positive.

The turn of a friendly card can often gain great momentum likewise. A REALLY Fabulous Gal in your life -- and as for your musical/musician lifestyle as well getting SUCH a boost symbiotically??

Those Turning Friendly Cards are shaping up to be a Straight Flush, my man --
-- From one Hot-Irish Blooded fellow to another: Keep On-a Keepin' ONNN!!!

/ SB :-D

[VictorLouis]

Good for you! However, being a divorced father with sole custody of my son, I'm going to focus in like a laserbeam for the sake of your kids.

IF in fact you're paying child-support, that means that the mother has visitation time. WHY? You need to get back to court and do the very best for those kids, which is getting them the H*** away from the mother while she's a user. Perhaps there's more to the story that I'm missing, such as mother's time is supervised, perhaps with the grandparents you mentioned?

In my state, support goes to the court, and through the court, to the other parent. Is this not the case in NC? What I'm driving at is, giving money to grandparents is one thing. However, what if they side with their daughter, and say you've never given them a dime? Where's your proof, or documentation? Indeed, if you're not familiar with the expression, "Blood IS thicker than water." If they're with you now, it may be because they can't deny the obvious about their daughter. How about if the ex cleans-up for a few weeks or months? Where do you think their loyalty will turn? It took a LONG time for my ex-wife's mom to see the light.

What about custody? Does your state separate custody from 'parenting-time'? IOW, custody is the right to make decisions about, and for, your kids. Medical, education, and religious decisions. Visitation with the kids in my state is 'parenting-time'.

It took me 4 long years, but I fought because my ex is an alcoholic. FINALLY, the court sided with me after providing her chance after chance. I have sole custody and parenting time, and I decide when and whether my son visits with his mother. Obviously, I know he needs to, and I don't abuse my 'power', but there are times when she's on a bender that it's just NOT going to happen.
Child support? I can get some from HER! However, I've told the court that it's better she keep that paultry sum and use it for her own treatment.

IF you're in that boat, keep up the fight! :)

[Sequimite]

Often in life things have to get really bad before we're able to move on. Perhaps that's the silver lining in this series of unfortunate events.

When my sister would call me about her a$$ of a husband I would always advise her to keep trying to make it work so that when the break came she would be able to move on knowing that she had exhausted every effort to save the marriage. She moved on finally and met a wonderful guy; they've been together for twelve years now and are very happy.

Best wishes. It sounds like everything you went through was worth it since it brought you to your soul mate.

[psimonl]

I'm glad to read that even though you had real hard times, you stay optimistic and keep in posotives toughts..

take care,

Simon