Stella Awards

[Dr. Snubnose]

Proof of entitlement mentality

It's time again for the annual "Stella Awards"! For those unfamiliar
with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who
spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in
New Mexico where she purchased the coffee. You remember, she took the lid
off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who
would ever think one could get burned doing that, right?


That's right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and
verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch
your head. So keep your head scratchier handy.


Here are the Stella's for the past year:


7TH PLACE:
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of
her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised
by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

6TH PLACE:
Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles, California won $74,000 plus medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman
apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when
he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.


Go ahead, grab your head scratchier.

5TH PLACE:
Terrence Dickson, of Bristol, Pennsylvania, who was leaving a house
he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson,
the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the
garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut.
Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a
large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company
claiming undue mental Anguish.

Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson
$500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.
Keep scratching. There are more...



4TH PLACE:
Jerry Williams, of Little Rock , Arkansas , garnered 4th Place in the
Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being
bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the
beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as
much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been
provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the
fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.


Grrrrr .... Scratch, scratch.



3RD PLACE:
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a
Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled
soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the
floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during
an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for their own
actions?


Scratch, scratch, scratch.. Hang in there; there are only two more
Stella to go...



2ND PLACE:
Kara Walton, of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a
nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking
out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through
the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said
the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah,
plus dental expenses. Go figure..



1ST PLACE: (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)
This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv
Grazinski, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven
on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the
driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich.
Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned.
Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the
owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the
cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down,
$1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals
as a result of this suit, just incase Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who
might also buy a motor home.



Are we, as a society, getting more stupid...?
Doc :D

[Spyderwings]

Are we, as a society, getting more stupid...?
Doc

Yes. Yes we are.

[Th232]

Are we, as a society, getting more stupid...?
Doc :D

How dare you insinuate that society is getting more stupid! I'm suing you on behalf of humanity! :mad:



:p :p :p

[Michael Cook]

:spyder: It's because we lie and tell our children that they're special, gifted and can do anything they want in life instead of giving them chores and whupin's. :spyder:

[malice4you]

:spyder: It's because we lie and tell our children that they're special, gifted and can do anything they want in life instead of giving them chores and whupin's. :spyder:

That's the truth.....

My #1 rule of life is "people are idiots."* If you live with that in mind, you expect the worst from everyone....and more and more, it seems like I'm right. When I'm with friends and we see someone do something stupid, all we say to each other is "#1."

These lawsuits scare me.



*(I don't deny that this includes myself.)

[Brad S.]

Dang,
And I thought it was redicoulous when the Insurance company of the woman that hit me with a car (I was on a bicycle, she hit me at 40 mph from the side, ran a red light) gave me ten thousand dollars to "Not sue us". I wasnt even going to sue, I just wanted my medical bills paid for, and my bike replaced. But whatever. Those are great. :rolleyes:

[Puyallupknifegu]

Doc, I think I've read these before, but...there are no words...there needs to be a word worse than "stupid"...




:eek:

[dialex]

This is what we are... It would be fun if it wouldn't be true
I think one of the most pathethic thing in all this are those people in the jury, who instead of kicking the butts of those who come with such ridiculous claims, listen to them and agree that their rights were violated.

[malice4you]

sad thing is, based on these juries, if WE use a knife to defend ourselves, we'd probably end up having to pay the person who attacked us.

I wonder what kind of case I've gotta go be on a jury for on the 31st..?

[jujigatame]

This is one of those times where if I had a brick wall next to my computer I would be striking it with my head. Repeatedly. With force.

Amazing that putting yourself in a position to be harmed, or being harmed simply by accident, entitles you to something as long as it occurs on someone else's property.

[Alteran]

Looks like we need a bit more chlorine in the gene pool...

Malice4you, I'm sure you'll surprise everyone by brining some common sense to the judicial process.

[Bolster]

Are we, as a society, getting more stupid...?
Doc :D

I but stupid more you! You make at me bad! Hey, I victim, you pay!

[Bolster]

It's because we lie and tell our children that they're special, gifted and can do anything they want in life instead of giving them chores and whupin's.

I tell my kid she's special, just like everyone else.